Link to meditation, guided by Ajahn Brahm.
Came to the meditation after a busy time at work, with my head full of business things to do, physically there was some discomfort in my side. During the meditation I was able to occasionally refocus and remember the simile of the lotus, i.e. when I drifted I came back to the meditation object by briefly imagining the image of a lotus and seeing whether any layers of the lotus had opened. I was able to let go of my body somewhat, my back ached a little, though that did not make me adjust my posture much, and I was more comfortable in my posture than recent days, the discomfort in my side disappeared.
Right near the end of the meditation when Ajahn Brahm was asking us how we felt, I had a sense of following the in breath and out breath more fully, they were deeper than I had noticed previously, more connected to my stillness, as if their motion was an equilibrium either side of the moment of my center. There were times when I felt I was experiencing 'now' and not being in thoughts of past or future, so this meditation allowed me to be more peaceful than the others this week. I did not feel I went far into the lotus at all, it was more as if some petals had opened in one part of the flower and stayed closed in another - a patchy blossoming. I had felt early on in the meditation that though the outer petals were shut, there was activity underneath, as if there was a readiness for the outer petals to begin opening, though they would not. The images of the lotus were very infrequently in my mind, but at least I had it in mind, and was able to be guided by instruction instead of forgetting the instruction almost the instant I had begun to relax the body as my practice often finds, in this I was an improved student.
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