Wednesday 19 February 2014

'Center Of Attention' Meditation Reflection - Feb 19 14

Link to meditation, guided by Ajahn Brahm.

Came to it with only a little physical discomfort but significant mental distraction as a loved one was very unwell, in fact this disrupted the meditation a couple of times, but once I settled into the mediation properly it was quite peaceful, there were moments of silence and feeling myself in the moment. I was not quite able to let the body go, the physical distractions never truly leaving, but they were peripheral as befit the practice following the instruction for this meditation. I did not perceive a center of attention very clearly, did not have clarity, but indistinctly my center was peaceful. When I did drift off into thoughts they were not obsessive or anxiety provoking, despite being partially about concern for my loved one. In this respect I have been able to let go of anxieties so they do not trouble me as much as before I began meditating, though I can't say that I have been tested to any high degree regarding the stability of my feelings. I believe I have more tolerance for anxiety provoking issues but only in the sense that I don't hold on to them, that currently I just let them unfold with a fairly balanced attitude. I may have taken stress on physically more because of this more relaxed mental attitude, having seen some problems appear there, but overall I am healthier, and kinder to myself and others.

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